Things could be different
by Midnight-Gypsy101
Summary: Set during season 4, Rory is at Yale and Lorelai and Luke are engaged, starts as Rory's about to break up for her first summer break. With Jess back on the scene, could things be different? Reviews are very appreciated.
1. Chapter 1

Things could be different.

Disclaimer: Don't own

Background: This is set just as Rory is about to have her first summer break from Yale. Her mum and Luke are engaged, and Jess is back in the picture.

Chapter One: Just consider it

Rory was pleased to be back in Stars Hollow, the stress of studying for her finals before summer break was bearable, dealing with Paris' stress was not. So she'd decided to get into her car and drive to the one place she knew she could get some peace. Only when she'd arrived at her house, she'd found her best friend rehearsing with her band, and although Rory loved their music, and liked catching up with Lane, she had some serious studying that needed doing, and she needed quiet. So thinking quickly she decided to go to Luke's. Not a quiet place but now that her mother was engaged to Luke she could possibly secure the use of the apartment. So parking across the street, she pulled her bag of books out of the car and walked over, finding Luke at the counter, she smiled in greeting to some familiar towns people as they noticed her. Luke looked up and smiled.

'Hey, I didn't know you were back yet, schools doesn't break up for another week right?' Luke asked, filling up a cup of coffee for her on reflex, she sipped it thankfully before answering him.

'I have the day off for study for my finals. My first one is tomorrow and Paris was driving me crazy, so I was hoping I could use the apartment, it's just Lane is practicing over at the house, so it's not really quiet enough.' Rory explained.

'Sure, want any food?' Luke asked.

'Burger and fries would be good, and some more coffee to take up with me.' Rory replied.

'Coming right up.' Luke walked off again. Rory sipped at her coffee, letting the atmosphere of the town sink in, it was a warm sunny day outside, and usually she would got to the bridge to study on a day like this, but she couldn't bring herself to, the last time she'd been there had been with Jess. Since he'd left without a word of goodbye she'd tried hard to forget him, but it had proved harder than she'd thought it would.

'Hey sugar! How are you? I thought you weren't back until your mum's engagement party next week.' Babette broke into her thoughts, she looked at her neighbour with a smile, and explained again why she was here. Then they started chatting about the engagement party which had been scheduled for the first week of summer so Rory could attend. Despite the fact that her mum and Luke had been engaged for three weeks now, after they started dating a few days after Rory left for college. As her food arrived she said her goodbyes to Babette and walked up to the apartment, spreading her books and food out on the table. She hadn't been up here since Jess left, and was shocked that some of his things still remained, a small collection of books were on the bookcase, and a black zip up hooded top was left across his bed. Luke clearly hadn't bothered to move it, trying to block out thoughts of her ex-boyfriend she got on with her studying, loosing herself to the work that had to be done. Three hours later she got up to switch on a light, not having realised until now that it had gotten dark, and she'd been squinting at the work. Luke had popped up a while ago to let her know that he was going out with Lorelai tonight and he'd be back late so she was welcome to continue studying. She'd thanked him and gone back to work. But now she shivered from the slight draft in the apartment, and wished she'd brought a jumper with her, without thinking she went over to Jess' bed, picked up the black top and slipped it on over her pale green top, and zipped it up. It hung loosely round her slim waist, and was just slightly too long in the sleeves, but she felt comfortable and warm in it, it still held his scent. Cigarettes, coffee and the smell of old books al mingled together in a musky smell. Sighing heavily she decided to get a drink before returning to her revision, she walked to the fridge and stopped dead as she saw a sticky note on the fridge door. It simply read _Jess' Cell_ then his number. Rory felt numb, she hadn't realised that Luke had that number, though she guessed it made sense that he would have it. She ran her fingers over the ink and felt her heart skip, her head felt dizzy and she had to sit, but she took the note with her, pulling out her own phone she typed in the numbers. Battling with herself. _'Why are you doing this?' _Then changing her mind. _'Why shouldn't you call him, you could invite him to the engagement party, he has a right to be there. His uncle is getting married.' _She argued with herself, eventually pressing the call button, her heart beating fast against her ribcage as she listened to the ringing. Then she heard it.

'Hello?' Jess' voice sounded tired and slightly irritated, but it was him and her heart flipped in her chest.

'Hey…it's Rory.' She said quietly, although she hadn't needed to clarify who it was, he knew the voice the minute she said hey. It had stopped him in his tracks as he'd been walking towards a bus station somewhere in Kansas. He stayed silent for a minute making Rory doubt if he was still there.

'Jess?' She asked, her voice was shaking with nerves but she had to speak to him, she couldn't back out now.

'Sorry, I'm just surprised to hear from you.' He said breaking himself out of the shock he'd gone into. He sank down so he was sat on the curb, and she sat down on his bed.

'Yeah, I was studying in Luke's apartment and I found your number. So I thought I'd call…My mum and Luke are engaged, I don't know if you knew.' Rory said in a rambling way, trying to get over the awkwardness but she couldn't, neither of them could get past the fact that he'd left without telling her.

'Yeah Luke mentioned it.' Jess said pushing his hand through his hair.

'Of course. So um…Where are you?' She felt the tension build as they moved towards the subject of him leaving, but she desperately needed to know where he was, and that he was ok.

'I'm in Kansas. I was about to get a bus to Colorado. I've been travelling a bit.' Jess answered.

'Doing the Kerouac thing? Is that why you left? To travel?' Rory asked her tone a little sharper than she'd meant it to be, she heard his sharp intake of breath and regretted bringing it up. He took a minute before sighing and answering her.

'No. I went to California, my dad showed up in Stars Hollow, and so when he left I tracked him down and stayed with him for a bit. Then I started travelling when that fell apart…' There was something he wasn't saying, so Rory stayed silent, waiting. 'Rory I'm so sorry for how I left…I just…'

'It's ok you don't have to explain.' Rory was fighting back the tears, she didn't want to let him make her cry again. She was meant to be over him, and here she was sat on his bed, wearing his sweatshirt and calling him up at nine o'clock in the evening.

'No I owe you an explanation. I wasn't graduating Rory, I couldn't take you to prom and I felt like a failure, I'd let you down and I'd let Luke down. Then he kicked me out and I couldn't face telling you how much I'd messed up. You deserved better from me, I know that now, but at the time I just…I didn't know how to tell you. It was easier to bail.' Jess said true honesty in his voice. 'I never meant to hurt you.'

'I know…still it did hurt. You could have called.' Rory said. 'And I mean call and actually speak, not just stay quiet then hang up.'

'I didn't think you'd want to hear what I had to say.' Jess said uneasily.

'Anyway let's put that behind us, you've apologised and I forgive you, so…can we try and leave it all behind.' Rory said brushing away her tears.

'Yeah…If that's what you want.' Jess said not really know where this was headed. 'Rory?'

'I miss talking to you…I want to be friends, do you think we can handle that, friends I mean?' Rory asked. He never thought this would happen, he didn't think he'd ever get her forgiveness. And now here she was calling him up, them talking things through and getting back to a place where they could be friends.

'I think we can give it a shot.' Jess said. 'Maybe the distance will help us be friends.'

'Yeah…still what I was calling for is that my mum and Luke are having an engagement party next week, on Friday evening in the town square. I know Luke would love you to come.' Rory said. 'So…will you come?'

'Rory…I don't know if that's the best idea, people there don't exactly like me, I can't see anyone wanting me there.' Jess said thinking of a million reasons why he shouldn't go, and one rather big one why he should. He wanted to see her, although it would probably be hard, he knew that he wanted to see her more than anything else.

'Luke will want you there.' She paused and said a little quieter. 'I want you there…' Rory said.

'I just…'

'Just consider it.' Rory interrupted. He sighed, this girl would be the death of him.

'I'll think about it.' He agreed, getting onto his bus and taking a seat in the back.

'Good.' She said settling down, resting her head against the pillow, the phone pressed to her ear. 'So tell me about travelling.' She smiled, letting him tell her all about it, and in turn her telling him about Yale, the town and what she'd been up to. They talked for an hour before hanging up, with Jess promising to think about coming to the party, and the promise of an email with pictures when he managed to get to an internet café. She put the phone down on the table, put the phone number back on the fridge where it had been, after saving it to her phone, then fell asleep on Jess' bed, his copy of War and Peace by Tolstoy in her hands.

*

'Shh, she looks so peaceful.' Lorelai said after her and Luke had got back from their date. Lorelai had come upstairs after seeing Rory's car still parked outside, and had found her curled up on the bed. The sweatshirt still on her.

'You don't think she still likes Jess?' Luke wondered out loud, noticing it was Jess' sweatshirt and his book.

'No. She's over him and he's well out of the picture now, she's probably just tired from all the cramming. Still I'd better wake her.' Lorelai said going over and gently shaking her daughter awake. Rory's eyes fluttered open, and smiled as she thought of her conversation with Jess. Although she worried it had all been a dream and shot bolt upright, she was in Luke's apartment, and the phone was at her side. She relaxed a little, it hadn't been a dream. It was then that she noticed her mother standing next to the bed. She got up and straightened out her clothes.

'What time is it?' Rory asked, taking the coffee that Luke offered her.

'A little past midnight.' Lorelai replied. 'Are you ok hun?'

'Yeah.' Rory smiled. 'I'm good.' She added and she really meant it. Her and Jess had made a lot of progress tonight with that call, they were well on their way to being friends again. Even if that was all they'd ever be. She decided not to mention the call yet, just smiled and packed up her books.

'I should get back to Yale.' She said hugging her mum and thanking Luke for the use of the apartment.

'Tonight? Hun it's really late, can't you stay here tonight and head back tomorrow?' Lorelai questioned.

'I've got a really early final tomorrow, but I'll be ok. But Luke could I possibly get some coffee for the road?' She asked pulling out her travel mug from her bag.

'Yeah of course.' He headed downstairs to get the coffee, and was joined a few minutes later by the girls. They smiled at him and said goodnight, before leaving. Rory driving Lorelai back home, before going to Yale, promising she'd be back next week on Friday morning in time to help set up for the party. She drove back to Yale with a smile on her face at the thought of possibly seeing Jess in just over a week.

A/N- I already have a lot of Rory/Jess fics on the go which I should focus on, but then I had this idea and I couldn't resist writing it. Let me know what you think, I love to get reviews.


	2. Keeping in touch

Things could be different.

Disclaimer: Don't own

Background: This is set just as Rory is about to have her first summer break from Yale. Her mum and Luke are engaged, and Jess is back in the picture.

Chapter Two: Keeping in touch

Rory finished her final and sighed in relief as she walked out, she was exhausted, after getting home really late last night, she'd walked into her room to find Paris still up, freaking out about her first final, which was at the same time as Rory's. So she'd stayed up for another hour and a half to help calm Paris down. When her alarm had gone off, she'd thrown it across the room angrily, but the smell of coffee woke her, Paris' way of apologising for keeping her up. Reluctantly Rory had gotten out of bed, dressed and eaten, drinking three cups of coffee to try and keep herself awake. Then made her way to her final, feeling more awake and able to focus. Now that it was finished she walked back to her dorm, finding Paris the only one there, she took a seat on the couch and grabbed a bag of chips that were lying on the table in front of them.

'How'd it go?' Rory asked her friend.

'I think it would be fair to say I aced it.' Paris said proudly. 'How about you?'

'I did ok, I managed to stay awake which is good.' Rory smiled.

'You know I've been thinking, you can't blame me for keeping you up so late, not really. Because you're the one who didn't show up at the dorm until nearly one in the morning, what held you up?' Paris asked.

'Oh, I went to Stars Hollow to study and I called an old friend, lost track of time and ended up falling asleep.' Rory replied. 'Speaking of which I need to check my emails.' She got up and walked from the common room to her bedroom which she shared with Paris, pleased that Paris hadn't followed her, she sat cross legged on the bed and opened her laptop. Her face lighting up as she saw the email from Jess, she clicked to open it.

_Dear Rory,_

_As promised I have attached photo's, they aren't great but I hope you like them. I'll be able to show you more when we meet in person._

_I'm in Denver at the moment, after the seven hour bus ride last night, I managed to find myself a motel which had internet connection, so after getting some sleep I decided to write to you. I'm not really sure what to say, we covered so much last night that I don't know what else there is. Except to apologise again for leaving, I never should have done that._

_It's nine thirty in the morning at the moment, and it's already boiling hot. Jeez listen to me, this is me talking to you, it shouldn't be about the weather._

_How was your finale? I know you would of done well, there's no way you couldn't do well._

_We'll speak soon,_

_Jess._

Rory smiled at his words, then looked through the pictures, they were great, all different places and landmarks, she was a little jealous, sure she'd been to Europe, but she would also love to travel America. Pushing the thought aside she clicked to reply.

_Dear Jess,_

_The photo's are amazing, I cannot believe you travelled to all those places. You're hair is longer, still messy though, I'm glad some things never change. I would like to see more, so when do you think we'll see each other in person? Because I know of this great party, a week from today. It should be great, and I happen to know it's only 1854 miles from Denver to Connecticut, so it should only take you, about 1 day and 5 hours. Longer perhaps if you're still using buses, but still that isn't much is it. Let me know._

_Stop apologising for leaving, I think we thoroughly buried that last night, we talked about everything, so now we need to both move past it, ok?_

_To respond to you, no we shouldn't talk about the weather, but hey why not? I want to know what it's like where you are, how you are. So in the name of full disclosure, it is 11.13 here at Yale, it's scorching hot and Paris is complaining loudly about it from the other room. I just finished my Final, and I have another one starting in two hours, so I'm going to grab something to eat and some coffee._

_If you get a chance, call me before 1 this afternoon, if not then my final finishes at three, so call after that. If I don't hear from you I will call you this evening, either way one of us will call the other. Man have you ever seen call in a sentence so much, sorry._

_Talk soon,_

_Rory._

She sent the email then closing the laptop walked back into the common room.

'I'm heading out to get something to eat, you want to come along?' Rory asked, picking up her handbag.

'No thanks, I need to get in some more studying after this segment on the news has finished, I'll grab something on my way to my next finale.' Paris answered.

'When is your next one?' Rory asked, hooking her bag onto her shoulder, as her phone started ringing she rummaged through it, trying to find the phone before the caller rang off.

'3.30.' Paris replied, lifting her hand in goodbye as Rory nodded and left the dorm, finding her phone she pressed answer before looking at the caller ID.

'It's too hot, Michel is bugging me, the party plans are insane, Taylor keeps going on about needing a permit to have it in the town square, Luke tried to switch my coffee to decaf and my mother called me to say she and my dad would be at the party. How's your day so far? How'd the final go?' Rory grinned at her mothers insane rambling, laughing a little.

'I could barely wake up this morning, but I've had five cups of coffee and am purchasing a sixth as we speak, the final went really well and I have another in just under two hours, but I'm prepared so I am heading off campus to grab some food. I'm also too hot, but I'm feeling really good today, and I can't tell you the reason yet, but hopefully you'll find out at your party. As for Michel he's always bugging you, just bug him back, the party is going to be insane so of course the plans will be, but I promise it will be worth it, Taylor will come round, after Luke yells at him enough, Luke always tries to switch your coffee, it never works, and of course Grandma and Grandpa are coming, it's your engagement party.' Rory said talking in her usual quick voice, walking along the pathways of Yale as she did so, heading to a café she loved to get some food.

'Huh, well let me start by saying it's your own fault that you could hardly wake up this morning, because you travelled back so late last night, besides you did have a nap on Jess' bed so you shouldn't have been that tired. Next I am very proud that you're onto your sixth cup of coffee, however you have yet to beat me because I have reached the dizzying heights of nine, almost ten once I'm done with the one in my hand. I'm glad you're final went well, I'm proud of you babe, and don't worry about your next one because you'll be fantastic, in fact you should buy the tutor and other students sunglasses, so you don't blind them with your brilliance. You're incredibly mean for not telling me why you're feeling so good today, but you've made me even more impatient for Friday to find out why. I am already working on bugging Michel, he's about five seconds away from storming off in a huff because I'm messing with his post it note system, ha! There he goes. The party will be worth it, and you're right about Luke, but it can't be helped right, still I bet once we're married he'll stop trying to get me to drink decaf because I'll have the power to subject him to dinner with the Gilmore's and he'll have to take up drinking regular coffee to deal with it.' Lorelai said while sorting through some papers.

'Or whiskey, either one would work.' Rory said, quickly ordering her lunch while her mum was talking.

'True, but I can't really see Luke getting drunk can you?' Lorelai replied.

'No but I don't see him drinking coffee anytime soon.' Rory answered, waiting at the counter to get her food.

'I swear one day I will make him drink coffee. I have almost got him to agree to a coffee cake for the wedding.' Lorelai said smiling, feeling very pleased with herself.

'I feel sorry for any man that tries to come between a Gilmore Girl and anything with coffee in the title.' Rory said taking her lunch and sitting at a table by the window.

'So do I…Oh! Oh no, hun I have to go Sookie just burnt her arm on a frying pan.' Lorelai said, ending with a panicked voice.

'Oh no. Give her my love.' Rory said before ringing off. She sat down and ate for ten minutes before her phone rang again, she picked up on the second ring.

'So I get the feeling you wanted me to call.' Jess' voice said, she could imagine him smirking at that comment, which made her smile.

'I didn't mention it that much.' Rory defended, sipping her seventh cup of coffee.

'Sure, only you wrote it so much that the computer I was using actually sighed by the end of it.' Jess joked.

'Don't tease me. So…have you decided about the party yet?' Rory asked, playing with her napkin.

'Not yet, I'm thinking about it.' Jess said while he was walking through the streets of Denver. Trying to see as much as possible before he got another bus somewhere else tonight, he'd made no definite plans as to where he was headed, but he never did.

'Ok but don't think I won't be asking you again tomorrow.' Rory said stubbornly. 'And the next day, and the…'

'Ok point taken. So are you nervous about your next final?' Jess asked, walking across the street.

'A little, I always get nervous, but it's an English Lit class so I should be ok doing it.' Rory replied. 'I've been thinking Jess, have you done anything…education wise I mean, classes or anything?' She approached the subject carefully, not wanting to spoil the friendship they were working on.

'Actually…' Jess paused for a second before continuing. 'I got my GED.'

'Really! Jess I'm so proud of you, I knew you could do it.' Rory cried out excitedly, getting odd looks from the other customers, she looked round sheepishly, getting up and paying, then walking back towards the campus.

'Don't go all cheerleader on me now Gilmore. It's no big deal.' Jess shrugged his shoulders.

'It is a big deal, I always knew if you just put your mind to something you could do it.' Rory smiled to herself. 'You're so smart. So any ideas what you're next move is?'

'No, I'm not even sure where I'll be tomorrow, I know I'll be sleeping on a bus tonight but that's as far as my plans go.' Jess replied, knowing it wasn't the answer she was looking for.

'No plans to settle anywhere yet then?' Rory asked, a hint of hopefulness in her otherwise neutral voice. It didn't go unnoticed by Jess.

'Not yet, but maybe…soon. It depends.' Jess said once again shrugging his shoulders, despite Rory not being able to see the gesture.

'On what?'

'If I find somewhere I want to settle, if I decide I've seen enough stuff, it just…depends.' Jess said ending slightly evasively, typical Jess style.

'You'll let me know if you settle?' Rory asked, walking back into the dorm and raising a hand in greeting to Paris.

'I will, but don't get your hopes up. I'm not sure I'm ready to get a place, get a job. Way to much stability. I'm not used to it you know.' Jess joked.

'You'll never get used to it if you don't try.' Rory reasoned, grabbing a soda from the fridge.

'You make a good point. Listen as much as I would love to carry on this conversation, there is this great bookstore I've found and you're not allowed cell phones inside for some reason. So I'll call you tonight ok?' Jess asked, wanting to know if she wanted to talk to him again so soon.

'Sounds good, and buy me something in that store, you can give it to me at the party.' Rory smiled.

'I haven't said I'll go yet.'

'Goodbye Jess.' Rory laughed.

'Bye Rory.'

A/N- I was going to put in a conversation with Paris as well but this is getting pretty long so that'll be in the next part. Please review, and thanks to everyone who has reviewed so far.


	3. It hurts a little less now

Things could be different.

Disclaimer: Don't own

Background: This is set just as Rory is about to have her first summer break from Yale. Her mum and Luke are engaged, and Jess is back in the picture.

A/N- Just something you may need to know that I forgot to mention, Luke already knows about April and Lorelai and her know each other. None of the break up over April ever happened. And Jess didn't come back in a family matter and tell Rory he loved her.

Chapter Three: It hurts a little less now.

'Jess?' Paris voice was a mixture of shock and disgust. 'You were talking to Jess?'

'Yeah.'

'The same Jess that skipped town without so much as a so long to his girlfriend. That Jess.' Paris asked.

'Yes that Jess, what's your point Paris?' Rory asked sitting on the couch.

'I didn't think you were in contact with him, or that you were so friendly with him' Paris said still sounding confused, she watched Rory's face to try and gather what was going on.

'It's a recent thing, only since last night. I saw his number in Luke's place and I just…I don't know I wanted to call him and we spent ages talking about what happened, working through it and we're going to be friends. I invited him to my mum's engagement party, though I'm not sure he'll come. I haven't told anyone else that we're in contact just yet, I want to save it as a surprise for Luke if he does come, so don't go calling my mum to discuss me ok.' Rory warned knowing what Paris was like, Paris shook off the comment and continued to question Rory.

'You really think you're ready to see him?' She asked, Rory looked away nervously.

'I don't know. I want to see him and I know Luke will want him there, it'll be hard I guess. I'm not really sure how to act around him, it's easier on the phone. I'm afraid that if I see him I'll just see the boy who broke my heart, and not the guy I've been talking to these last two days who's trying to make amends for it.' Rory sighed. 'But I do want to see him.'

'You're mad Gilmore, I mean sure he has more intelligence that farmer John that you dated, but he left, if it were me I'd kick him to the curb.' Paris said firmly.

'I couldn't do that to Jess, he was far to big a part of my life.' Rory said sadly.

'Rory, you don't still have feelings for him do you? After what he did surely you don't.'

'No, not in that way. He'll always mean something to me because I loved him, and it was deeper than anything I felt for Dean, he may have been my first love but Jess…well it was just different, more. He was the first guy I was in love with, I loved Dean but I was never in love with him.' Rory tried to explain, though her own feelings were still confused.

'I still think you're mad for letting him back into your life.' Paris shook her head.

'You will be nice to him if he does come on Friday, nobody really likes him in stars hollow so he'll need at least a few people who don't scowl at him all night.' Rory said worriedly.

'I'm not making any promises, we're talking about a guy who likes Kerouac here.' Paris shook her head. 'I should get back to this.' Paris pointed to her revision, seeing this Rory nodded, got herself her eight cup of coffee then returned to her room.

*

'Paris I'm sure you did fine on the test.' Rory tried to calm her down as she pressed answer on her phone.

'No! I didn't I completely blanked on three questions, how did that happen, I was prepared.' Paris yelled.

'Is this a bad time?' Jess asked hearing the raised voice of Paris in the background.

'No, it's fine. So where are you? I can hear the sound of a bus so you must be going somewhere new, Denver didn't interest you much huh?' Rory said ignoring the glare she was getting from Paris. Going into the common room where Tana and Janet were sat watching television, or at least Tana was watching it, while Janet was exercising again.

'Denver was dull, though I did get you something as per your request.' Jess replied.

'Aw sweet, what is it?' Rory asked, once again ignoring the sickened look on Paris face, she'd followed Rory out of their room, and was now listening into the conversation. To avoid this Rory went out into the hall and sat propped up against the wall.

'You'll just have to wait and see.' Jess said.

'Till when? Friday?' Rory pried.

'Still don't know, but if you keep asking I may have to decline the offer.' Jess replied.

'Shutting up now. So you never said where you were headed.' Rory said changing the subject.

'St Louis.' He replied.

'To the fair?' Rory asked excitedly.

'I'll see what I can do.' Jess said leaning back in his seat. It was pretty late, gone ten and most of the people on the bus were sleeping with the exception of a woman sat near Jess who was glaring at him for making so much noise.

'I can't help but mention that from St Louis you just have to hop on the I-70 east for about 1050 miles and you'll be in Connecticut.' Rory smiled. Looking up to see Marty coming down the hall, she smiled at him and offered a little wave.

'Rory.' Jess' tone was warning but she could tell he wasn't really mad.

'I know, don't push it.' Rory responded straight away.

'It isn't that I don't want to see you.' Jess said more seriously now, Rory sighed a little.

'I know.'

'I just don't know if I can go back. Me and Luke have been talking but not often, it's usual one or two calls a month and they only last about five minutes each, he kicked me out and I'm not saying I didn't deserve it because I did, but I don't think he'll want me back there.' Jess replied.

'He will, Jess as much as you might think otherwise, Luke loves you like a son, he'll always welcome you back.' Rory said trying to make Jess believe her.

'Maybe. Anyway I should go because I'm disturbing people, and I don't want to make them mad because there's another unbearable nine hours to go on this bus ride.' Jess said reluctant to hang up.

'Ok. I have more finals tomorrow so I'll call you when I'm done.' Rory replied. 'Get some sleep.'

'Will do, night Rory.'

'Goodnight Jess.' Rory replied hanging up the phone and turning her attention to Marty who was still in the hall. 'You want to sit.'

'Uh yeah I guess. So isn't Jess your ex you mentioned?' Marty asked sitting down on the floor next to her.

'He is.'

'Are you two back together? Because the way Paris tells it he broke you're heart.' Marty said looking at her questioningly.

'We're not back together, just friends again. It hurts a little less now. I think it's good that we're friends again. I missed being able to talk to him, because besides my mum he's the only person who knows me completely. It's nice to have that.' Rory sighed. 'Anyway, how was your final today?' Rory asked moving away from the subject of Jess.

'Hard, but I think I did ok. So do you think you will get back with him?' Marty asked, he looked over at Rory knowing that she'd probably never see him as more than a friend.

'Marty I told you we're just friends.' Rory said quickly. 'I only just started talking to him again yesterday.' She added not mentioning the fact that they'd already had three phone calls and a couple of emails in that time, not to mention the texts that she'd received and replied to. But that's what you did with friends, you stayed in touch.

'Ok I'm officially dropping it.' Marty replied. 'So I'm working this fancy dinner party tomorrow night, I could try and get some left over's and bring them round, we could watch a movie or something.' Marty offered.

'Sounds good, but I made plans. My best friend Lane is coming here tomorrow to hang out and plan the secret surprise gift that we are getting for my mum's engagement party.' Rory replied apologetically. 'Maybe some other time.'

'Yeah sure, I'd better head off, I've got an early final tomorrow. Though it is my last one.'

'Part timer, my last one isn't until Friday morning.' Rory replied mock grumpily. He laughed as he stood up, offering his hand to help her up, she took it and went over to her door.

'Bye.' Rory waved before heading back inside, walking into the middle of a row.

'All I'm saying is that if you insist on doing that here, at least get a trampoline that doesn't make that loud squeak every time you jump on it.' Paris yelled.

'This is the common room! You can't tell me that I can't exercise in here, and I can't help that it makes that sound, I'm not going to get another one, you'll just have to deal with it.' Janet said defiantly.

'It's putting me off my studying, I won't let my education suffer because of that noise.' Paris yelled back.

'Study in your room.' Janet shouted.

'Exercise in your room.' Paris shot back.

'Oh boy.' Rory rolled her eyes, glad that she'd be heading home for the summer on Friday, even though Paris was travelling back with her to attend the engagement party before going back home to Hartford.

'Rory don't you think she should exercise in her room.' Paris said, as usual trying to drag Rory into their fights, but as usual Rory refused to take sides.

'I'm staying out of it. I'm also heading to bed.' Rory replied going into her room and changing into her pyjamas, curling up under her covers she got out a book to read then dialled her mums number.

'Hey hun.' Lorelai said answering after the fourth ring.

'Hey, I just called to say goodnight.' Rory replied. 'And see if you got Luke to agree to the coffee cake yet.'

'We've agreed on half coffee, half chocolate, Sookie is already working out the recipe, it'll be four tiers, alternate flavours.' Lorelai said excitedly.

'Sounds perfect. And what about a dress?' Rory asked.

'How could I pick out a dress without your opinion. We'll be wedding planning the whole summer, the finally in the last week of August…I will get that cake.' Lorelai laughed.

'Not to mention a husband.' Rory reminded her.

'Oh of course.' Lorelai smiled. 'And a step daughter, speaking of April, she'd staying for the week now before the party and the whole summer, she arrived today, we've put up a temp bed in your room so you'll have a roommate this summer. Is that ok?' Lorelai asked.

'Sure, I'd like to get to know her a little more.' Rory agreed. 'So how many cups of coffee did you drink?'

'Fifteen in the end.' Lorelai said. 'And you?'

'Ha! I had sixteen, though to be fair I did need it to stay awake, which is why I'm going to bed now.' Rory replied.

'Sure you are, after what 100 pages of the book you have on your lap.' Lorelai said.

'I do not have a book on my lap.' Rory said in mock offence.

'Sure, so which invisible book is it?' Lorelai questioned.

'Howl.' Rory replied looking down at the book in her lap, opening the page to reveal Jess' cramped handwriting in the margins.

'Ha I knew you had a book.' Lorelai said triumphantly.

'Goodnight mum.' Rory said lightly, already reading through the book but focusing on the notes.

'Goodnight hun.' Lorelai replied. Both girls hung up the phone, each of their thoughts turning to someone else. For Lorelai it was her fiancé and for Rory, it was to Jess. She fell asleep holding the book, a soft smile on her face.

A/N- Hope you like it. I feel like I am on a roll with this story. Please review, let me know if you love it, like it or have anything you'd like to see happen and I will see if I can include it.


	4. Ernest Rand

Things could be different.

Disclaimer: Don't own

Background: This is set just as Rory is about to have her first summer break from Yale. Her mum and Luke are engaged, and Jess is back in the picture.

Chapter Four: Ernest Rand

'It's so weird being one of the last ones here, the campus looks so empty now.' Rory mused to Paris as they walked back to the dorm together after both finishing their last finals. Rory was excited, they'd be leaving for Stars Hollow in less than three hours, they just had to finish packing and load up the two cars. Then tonight Rory was going to her mums engagement party, though she was feeling a little disappointed. Her and Jess had spoken everyday, usually more than once each day, since she'd first called him, and yet he still wouldn't say if he was coming tonight, he always became evasive, changing the subject away from the town. Though she held out a little hope that he hadn't come outright and said no either. She snapped herself out of these thoughts when she heard Paris talking.

'Personally I think it's better like this, less noise so I can just focus on studying without having to listen to Janet or Tana, and there aren't any lines when I go for a coffee or something.' Paris replied, Rory just laughed thinking how typical it was of Paris to respond like that.

'Speaking of coffee, I'm going to take advantage of the no lines and get myself some, want anything?' Rory asked, stopping to turn down another pathway to find one of the coffee carts, there were only a few left open considering most of the students had left home.

'No, I want to get all my things packed and hit the road, I promised my parents that I'd call in before the party and I'll need to change, goodness knows what it is they want to tell me, but hey I'll go anyway, like I actually have the time to spare to listen to them talk about their latest fight.' Paris said with her customary sarcastic tone.

'Ok, well if I'm not back before you leave, I'll see you at 7.' Rory replied. 'Though I should be back in about 10 minutes, it depends on how far I have to walk to find coffee.' Rory laughed, going off down the pathway, as Paris walked into their dorm block. She found a coffee cart quickly and paid for her coffee, debating if she should go straight back to the dorm, or go and find something to eat since it was lunch time, she wandered slowly round the campus for five minutes, taking in the emptiness of the place, she'd never seen it like this before and she was enjoying it.

'Hey…' The voice from behind her startled her, she hadn't heard anyone. Spinning round quickly she met a pair of brown eyes she was very familiar with. All worries she'd had about how she would react when she finally saw him in person flew out of her head in a matter of seconds, as she rushed towards him, throwing her arms around his neck. He staggered back a little but let his arms snake around her waist.

'I wasn't sure you'd come.' Rory said clinging onto him tightly.

'Well I heard there was a party tonight, and since I was in the area.' Jess smirked, she pulled back from him, though one of his arms remained round her waist.

'In the area? When I spoke to you yesterday afternoon you were in Montreal in Canada.' Rory said looking over at him.

'I was, but I hitched a ride as far as New York, then hitched another one as far as The hospital here in New Haven, and walked the last 25 minutes of the journey.' Jess explained.

'Ah I see, that kind of in the area.' Rory smiled at him, then hugged him again.

'I'm really pleased you came.' Rory said. 'So…I have this big pile of boxes back at my dorm, feel like helping me transport them to my car?' Rory asked hopefully, already leading the way to her dorm. He smirked at her, but followed, letting his hand rest on the small of her back gently.

'What do I get out of it?' Jess asked teasingly.

'Hmm let me see, I won't make you find your own way back to Stars Hollow, I'll give you a lift.' Rory offered.

'Deal.' Jess agreed.

'So how did you find me? The campus is pretty big.' Rory asked as they walked back to her dorm.

'Well I found out where your final was, and actually I'm a bit concerned for your safety, because I was trailing you for a good fifteen minutes before Paris left.' Jess said. Rory stopped in her tracks to look round at him.

'Fifteen minutes? Why didn't you come up and say hi?' Rory asked.

'I was waiting till Paris went.' Jess shrugged.

'You do know there's a good chance she'll still be at the dorm.' Rory said in all honesty. He looked at her and nodded, putting his arm back around her waist to guide her on again, they walked a little further.

'So do you know how long you're staying?' Rory asked, stepping through the door into the dorm block.

'Not sure, a couple days maybe.' Jess shrugged, they stopped outside her door, while she found her keys.

'It's about time Gilmore! I need your help….' Paris pulled open the door after hearing Rory's keys, trailing off as she spotted Jess. 'Oh it's you.'

'So it appears.' Jess replied, raising his eyebrows in amusement.

'I didn't know you were coming.' Paris said icily. Jess just shrugged.

'It was last minute.' Jess said following Rory into the common room, she stood a little uneasily, watching how Paris glared at him.

'Like you leaving last year?' Paris asked.

'Paris!' Rory warned.

'Sorry, whatever I'm leaving. I'll see you tonight Rory.' Paris said dragging her last bag to the door, stopping by Rory's side.

'Do you want me to stay?' She whispered.

'No, it's fine, why would I?' Rory asked.

'Because he's here and I don't trust him.' Paris said eyeing him wearily.

'Paris, me and Jess are friends, he's helping me load up my car then we're heading back to stars hollow, simple as that.' Rory replied.

'Well then, I'll see you tonight.' Paris said, leaving the dorm, Rory turned round to face Jess who was smirking back at her.

'Sorry about her, she's a little…'

'Deranged?' Jess offered, Rory shook her head but didn't say anything, instead choosing to start throwing the remainder of her things into boxes and bags, with help from Jess.

'So how was your first semester at Yale? Learn anything interesting?' Jess asked, after they'd loaded the car and they were handing in the keys.

'Sure…I learnt where all the best coffee is, that when I come back I need to share a place with people who like each other, and that studying for finals is a lot less stressful when you've got someone to talk to who knows you really well.' She replied, aiming the last bit at him, he caught her meaning and looked sideways at her as they got into the car.

'I should have been there for you from the start of Yale, I treated you…' Jess began but got cut off by Rory.

'Jess, I'll just ask one thing and then I truly want all of that left in the past, so will you answer me one thing truthfully?' Rory asked looking over at him, he nodded slowly.

'Seems only fair.'

'Ok, when you left…was it because you didn't want to be with me anymore? Did you stop liking me? Did you go because you didn't want to be with me?' He could see the tears in her eyes and it broke his heart, taking her hand in his to try and comfort her, he gave her the most honest answer he could.

'I left despite wanting to be with you, Rory don't ever think that it was because of you that I left. I was messed up, and everything was spiralling out of my control. I didn't want to disappoint you, and I was afraid that if I stuck around we'd break up because I was failing everything. But I never stopped having feelings for you.' Jess replied, he'd never been that honest with anyone but Rory, she had a way of making him want to tell the truth. She watched him closely for a second, leaning over the gap between their seats she hugged him.

'I'm glad you came back.' She whispered, sitting back in her seat she turned on the ignition and drove towards home. Stopping at the inn where they'd decided Jess would stay since he didn't think he'd be welcome in Luke's apartment anymore. They went in and Jess was pleased to find all the staff occupied with something in the kitchen, involving Sookie cutting something while preparing the food for the party. He was even more relieved when he found out from Rory that Lorelai wasn't working today, so Rory went behind the desk of her mothers inn, and went to book him in.

'Name?' She asked him, he raised an eyebrow at her in question.

'Are you suffering from amnesia?' He asked smirking at her.

'Ha very funny, I just don't want Sookie or someone else seeing your name here and reporting back to her before I get the chance to surprise Luke. So what name would you like?' Rory swatted his arm playfully.

'Um…How about Jack Hemmingway.' He smirked, seeing the annoyed look on her face.

'No.'

'Well I think Ernest Hemmingway would seem a little suspicious.' He said leaning on his elbows on the desk.

'Ooh I know.' She typed into the computer with a smile on her face, not letting on to what she'd put in. She saved it and grabbed the key. 'Ok room seven, drop your things off then we're heading to my house to see my mum, and I think Luke may be there to sort out last minute party details.' Rory said.

'What name did you put?' Jess asked. But she shook her head, refusing to tell him until he came back down after dropping his bags off, she waited for him in the car, and he appeared a few minutes later, climbing back into the car.

'So what name?' He asked as she pulled away.

'Ernest Rand.' She smiled happily. He groaned slightly, but couldn't help the smile that spread onto his face.

'Because that won't look suspicious.' He joked, receiving her sticking her tongue out at him.

*

'Mum?' Rory's voice called through the house to find her mothers whereabouts. A reluctant Jess following behind her, they'd gotten to about five minutes outside of Stars Hollow when he'd started regretting his choice to come back, he'd wanted to bail as soon as they parked, and just run as fast as he could out of this place without looking back, but then Rory had smiled at him and he found himself getting out of the car and walking up the steps of the house with her. Now here he was standing in the little hall, while Rory dropped a few bags onto the floor.

'We're in the kitchen.' Lorelai's voice floated back through the house.

'Who's we're?' Rory asked, heading towards the kitchen, Jess hung back a little as per Rory's request on the journey, she'd wanted to surprise Luke.

'Me and Luke.' Lorelai replied. Rory walked into the kitchen after mouthing to Jess for him to wait for her pre arranged single before he walked in.

'Good, because I have a surprise for you both.' Rory said leaning down and kissing her mum who was sat at the table opposite Luke.

'Hey Rory.' Luke greeted her, she greeted him back before her mum burst out excitedly.

'Surprise? Is it an engagement gift?' Lorelai asked.

'You'll get that tonight, this is more of a thing for Luke.' Rory replied. 'I figured that you deserved something seen as this whole party is catered to my mum.' Rory joked. 'So here's your gift.' She said stepping aside as Jess walked into the kitchen. Lorelai and Luke looked at him stunned.

'Jess!' Luke said standing up, hugging his nephew awkwardly.

'Hey uncle Luke, surprised?' Jess said awkwardly.

'Yeah very, what are you doing here?' Luke asked.

'Rory invited me, and I was close by so I came.' Jess shrugged, acting as if it were no big deal.

'Rory a word please.' Lorelai said pulling her daughter into Rory's bedroom and shutting the door.

'Don't freak out.' Rory begged.

'You turn up here with Jess and you tell me not to freak out. I didn't even know you were in contact with him, let alone inviting him to parties. Is this what you were talking about the other day, the thing you were happy about that you'd reveal today?' Lorelai said trying to keep her voice at a normal tone but failing.

'Yes it was what I was talking about and we haven't been in contact long, I called him a week ago because I found his number, and we decided to be friends, we've been talking a lot. And Luke is his uncle so he had a right to be invited.' Rory defended.

'But it's Jess. The same guy who left town without telling you, the same Jess who broke you're heart.' Lorelai shouted.

'We've worked through all that, he's explained it and apologised. I don't like him being out of my life, try and understand please.' Rory begged.

'I am trying but I just don't know what it is about Jess that makes you so…' Lorelai trailed off unable to finish her sentence.

'So what mum? What does Jess make me?'

'Flighty, I guess would be how I'd put it. Ever since he first came to town you had this strange thing with him, he had some sort of hold on you. He comes here and you push Dean away and fall for Jess, he leaves and you skip school to see him in New York, he comes back and you kiss him despite having a boyfriend, you date him and then he leaves you with no word, and you call him up and start being all friendly with him again, so no I don't understand, explain it to me, explain why you always go after Jess?' Lorelai said frustrated.

'Because…'Rory stumbled over her words, aware that Luke and Jess could probably hear every word they were saying.

'Because what Rory?'

'Because I can be myself with Jess, because he knows me better than anyone else, because he makes me feel happy and makes me smile, I just…I can't explain it. Back in high school when he left after the accident, I heard his voice when he called me and I just had to see him, then last week in Luke's apartment I saw his number and I had to call him, I had to know that he was ok, and sure at first I was angry with him for leaving, but that's gone now. I want to be friends with him.' Rory yelled back, both of them stared at each other for a moment, before both sitting on the edge of the bed side by side.

'Hun, I don't want you to get hurt again. You're sure this is just friends, you don't still have feelings for Jess.' Lorelai asked quietly so the guys wouldn't hear.

'No I don't. But he's a really good friend, and that's all it is.' Rory replied, though a little voice in the back of her mind was screaming _Liar_.

A/N- Hope you liked it. It's 2:25 in the morning at the moment and I just finished this, so sorry if it's in anyway messy or written badly, that's what happens when insomnia writes the chapter for me. Anyway, please review and let me know what you think.


	5. Pitchforks and Torches

Things could be different.

Disclaimer: Don't own

Background: This is set just as Rory is about to have her first summer break from Yale. Her mum and Luke are engaged, and Jess is back in the picture.

A/N- Just something you may need to know that I forgot to mention, Luke already knows about April and Lorelai and her know each other. None of the break up over April ever happened. And Jess didn't come back in a family matter and tell Rory he loved her.

Chapter Five: Pitchforks and Torches.

'This was a bad idea.' Jess shook his head as the four of them walked towards the town square full of people.

'No arguments from me.' Lorelai said not looking at him, he'd broken her daughters heart so she would not be forgiving him as readily as Rory seemed to be.

'Don't worry it'll be fine.' Rory reassured him, resting her hand on his arm for a fleeting moment, before she placed her arm back at her side.

'I am glad you came Jess, it means a lot to me.' Luke said genuinely, Jess nodded and prepared for the evening, as they reached the square, Lorelai and Luke were pulled into hug after hug, everyone saying how pleased they were. People regarded Jess warily, trying to work out why he was here, and who's idea it was that he should be. After all he'd broken the town princesses heart, so they should act hostile towards the hoodlum who broke her heart, on his return to the town.

Trying to ease the pressure a little, Rory indicated to Jess that he should follow her over to where Lane was standing, hoping for some support from her friend. She didn't quite get what she'd bargained for though.

'I'm surprised you turned up.' Lane said coldly as they reached him. 'What makes you think you'd be welcome?'

'I was invited.' Jess said trying his hardest not to act angry, or sarcastic as he would have done in the past.

'By who? Nobody wants you here.' Lane said defensively, throwing Rory a look to make sure she was ok with the reappearance of her ex boyfriend.

'I invited him Lane, so be nice.' Rory said giving Jess a quick apologetic smile. He shrugged it off acting cool while wanting nothing more than to leave this party, leave the town, but no matter how strong those feelings were right now, there was a brunette girl standing beside him, looking amazing in a blue silk dress, one that he thought he had lost from his life, so he knew that he couldn't leave, because he wanted, no needed, her in his life and he wasn't going to risk messing up what they had, even if it could only ever be friendship.

'Excuse us.' Lane said grabbing Rory's arm and pulling her out of earshot of Jess, who stood leaning against a lamp post, much like he had a long time ago after the fake murder in the town, and still after all this time his sights were trailing Rory.

'What are you thinking? Have you lost your mind, because last I remember we swore to never speak to him again.' Lane said still holding onto her arm, Rory looked away sheepishly, her eyes resting on Jess for a few moments, she saw a flicker of a smile cross his face which caused butterflies in her stomach.

'No, you swore we'd never speak to him again.' Rory corrected, then continued, moving her gaze back to her best friend. 'He seems better now, we've talked it all through and we're going to try and be friends.'

'Sure because that worked so well last time.' Lane crossed her arms over her chest.

'What's that supposed to mean?' Rory asked crossly.

'Last time you and Jess tried to be friends it didn't turn out that way, you fell in love with him, left Dean and dated him until he ran off to goodness knows where and left you alone.' Lane said trying to protect Rory by making her see that Jess couldn't be her friend.

'But it's different this time, we are just friends, I have no boyfriend to worry about, and Jess went to live with his dad for a while.' Rory defended, Lane looked at her with worried eyes.

'Did you just hear yourself, in the same breath you said you were just friends and that you didn't have a boyfriend to worry about, question is, if you and Jess really are just friends then why would it matter if you did have a boyfriend?' Lane asked, Rory squirmed a little, she hadn't realised the way it had come out.

'I was just saying…never mind, all you need to know is that we're friends and that's all it is, now and always.' Rory said firmly.

'Ok if you say so. You'd better get back to your _Friend_, Miss Patty is heading his way.' Lane advised. Rory smiled and quickly made her way to Jess' side.

'How you doing?' Rory asked.

'I feel like they're about to chase me out of town with pitchforks and torches, other than that it's not too bad.' Jess smirked at her, she swatted his arm, leading him off to the side of the square to sit on a bench, watching over the party as Lorelai and Luke were opening gifts from their seats in the gazebo.

'They look happy don't they.' Rory said dreamily, she knew that Luke was the perfect match for her mum, and was so happy they'd finally got round to getting engaged. She smiled broadly as her mum unwrapped another gift.

'You look just as happy.' Jess commented, keeping his eyes on Rory, she turned to face him and again felt the butterflies as their eyes met.

'I am happy, she really deserves this.' Rory said relaxing against the back of the bench. Jess leaned back as well, rolling up the sleeves of his black shirt.

'You know, I'm not actually hating being back here.' Jess smirked at her, she smiled, tilting her head back to look at the sky, the sun was just setting and the glow across the town was beautiful, in only a few minutes it would be dark and the twinkle lights would come on around the square, which had been put there for the party. She looked back up, over the town. Her body tensed, Jess noticed the change in her as she sat bolt upright. He followed her gaze, and sure enough walking towards them was the cause of her sudden change in attitude.

'Seems I spoke to soon.' Jess said feeling himself grow angrier just by looking at him, the feeling appeared to me mutual as he walked towards them with a scowl on his face. Rory turned to Jess quickly, putting a hand on his wrist.

'Please be nice, I don't want anything to spoil this for my mum.' Rory begged him, her hand still resting on his arm, he glanced at her and then at him, before nodding his head quickly, Rory sighed in relief and removed her hand from his forearm.

'What is he doing here?' Dean demanded angrily. His eyes flashing with rage.

'I invited him, he is Luke's nephew.' Rory said quickly.

'I wouldn't care if he was Luke's son! He shouldn't be here.' Dean raised his voice a little. Drawing a little more attention than Rory had hoped for, she flashed him and angry look.

'Dean you're causing a scene, it's nothing to do with you who I invite to my mum's engagement party, Jess has just as much right to be here as you do, more even. So please don't cause a scene.' Rory said remaining seated next to Jess.

'Ok fine he's here, but you don't have to sit with him.' Dean said angrily. 'Come on, you shouldn't be near him.'

'Since when do you tell Rory who to hang out with?' Jess said in a laid back tone, though inside he wanted to revert back to himself a year ago and fight back.

'Dean, I want to sit with Jess. Please just go…you should go.' Rory said noticing her mothers eyes on the three of them.

'I'm not leaving until you come with me.' Dean stood his ground.

'Fine then we'll leave.' Rory got to her feet and indicated for Jess to follow, which he did quickly. Making their way over to Lorelai, Luke and April. The town watched on as Rory again chose Jess' company above Dean's.

'Hun, what was all that about?' Lorelai asked.

'Oh nothing, just Dean being a little over protective again.' Rory sighed, then smiled at her mum. 'Got any good gifts yet?'

'Oh loads.' Lorelai smiled, though was still a little worried, but decided to brush it aside for now and show Rory and April all the gifts. Soon after that the dancing started and Luke was pulled reluctantly to the floor by Lorelai. April was sat in the gazebo reading a book, which made both Rory and Jess laugh from their spot at the side of the dance floor.

'She's a lot like you, which is odd seen as she'd part of my family.' Jess laughed, Rory nodded.

'I know, though there's a lot of things she has in common with you, the reading thing is like both of us.' Rory acknowledged.

'True, and she does have a much tighter grip on reality than you ever did.' Jess teased.

'Hmm I blame my mother for that entirely.' Rory said with a smile. 'So you haven't told me about Canada, you said you were there just before coming here, how was it?' Rory asked.

'Not too bad, though I still haven't found anywhere better to live than New York.' Jess said staring out across the town, down towards the track that led to the bridge.

'Do you think you'll move back to New York?' Rory tried to keep the excitement from her voice but a little seeped in. He picked up on it and fought the urge to smile, instead he smirked at her.

'Do you want me to move back to New York?' Jess asked, the question took her by surprise, she didn't think her opinion would matter.

'I wouldn't hate it.' She shrugged keeping her voice level.

'Oh yeah.'

'Yeah.' She said shyly. They both stayed silent for a minute before moving onto slightly easier subjects of books, and movies. They stayed talking until all the guests had drifted home around 3 am. The music was still playing.

'Hey guys, we're going to head off now.' Lorelai indicated her and a very sleepy April. Luke said goodnight to Jess before going off to the diner. 'Rory, you coming?'

'Uh…you go ahead I'll turn the music off and clean up a bit, we don't want Taylor to go on a rampage about the state we left the place in.' Rory said. Lorelai looked worriedly between Rory and Jess, before slowly nodding, there wasn't much she could do to stop her daughter staying.

'Ok, don't be too long though, we need to be up bright and early tomorrow to go wedding dress shopping.' Lorelai reminded. Rory nodded, watching her mother and April walk towards the house. She turned back to Jess, they were now alone in the square, Rory shivered a little and Jess pulled his black leather jacket from beside them on the bench and put it on her.

'Looks good on you.' He smiled.

'Thanks.' She blushed. 'So we'd better clear up a bit.' Rory added getting to her feet, Jess caught her hand and stood beside her.

'Dance with me.'

'What?' Rory looked at him confused, she'd never taken Jess for the dancing kind, which was probably one of many reasons he'd waited till now to ask her to dance.

'Dance with me.' He repeated, leading her to the centre of the gazebo to dance, she nervously put her arms round his neck, his arms wrapped lightly round her waist as they moved slowly to the music drifting through the square.

'You know you're not half bad at this.' Rory smiled, resting her head on his shoulder.

'Neither are you.' He smirked.

'Ah but you forget I had dance lessons with Miss Patty for my coming out ball, what's your excuse, have you been sneaking lessons with Miss Patty?' Rory asked in mock horror.

'You got me, the whole time I lived here I was having lessons.' He smirked. She smiled happily and laughed, feeling his grip tighten ever so slightly.

'How do you really know how to dance?' Rory asked.

'Don't know, then again we are just moving side to side, it's not exactly hard.' He replied, she pulled back a little to look into his eyes. 'It's nice though.' He added.

'Yeah, really nice.' She said softly leaning her head back onto his shoulder as they continued to dance.

All the time Luke was looking on from the window in the diner apartment, a smile on his face as he watched the two dancing.

A/N- Hope you like it, please review.


	6. Tell me the truth

Things Could Be Different

Disclaimer: I don't own Gilmore Girls.

A/N- Hey guys, sorry it's been a while but I was away on holiday. Hopefully I will have all my stories updated soon, and I am working on something new. Please Review.

Chapter Five: Tell me the truth.

Lorelai looked over at her daughter as she finally came home and hour later. Rory didn't notice that her mother was still awake, and leaned against the door with a smile on her face, sighing lightly trying to figure out her feelings, she was almost certain that she felt something for Jess, she just couldn't bring herself to fully admit it. She wasn't willing to offer up her heart to be broken again, she'd have to tread carefully. She'd tried to convince herself she didn't have feelings for him once before and that had ended in them dating. Silently she wondered if she wanted to be with Jess again, though she didn't have time to figure it out because her mother finally made her presence known, startling Rory.

'What took so long?' Lorelai asked. Rory jumped and moved away from the door, trying to hide the blush spreading through her cheeks at the realisation of her mum watching her as she daydreamed about a certain dark haired man.

'You scared me, I thought you'd gone to bed.' Rory said taking the spare seat next to her mum on the couch.

'I thought I'd wait up for you, I didn't see you that much at the party. So you didn't answer my question, what took you so long?' Lorelai asked again, Rory squirmed a little, unsure of how to answer and still avoid having a long discussion about Jess.

'Uh well there was a lot to clear up.' Rory replied, which was true, her and Jess had spent a long time cleaning the square up as best they could.

'Did you have any help clearing up?'

'Jess stuck around.'

'I see…' Lorelai trailed off.

'Don't do that, don't use that tone, nothing happened. He just helped me clean up, we talked.' Rory defended.

'You two seemed to be very talkative tonight.' Lorelai commented.

'Yeah I guess, we just had a lot to talk about.' Rory shrugged, looking over at her mum she knew she couldn't lie. 'He asked me to dance.'

'Really? Jess dancing!' Lorelai held back a laugh, but then became more serious as she thought about what it meant, it was clear that Jess still had feelings for Rory, Lorelai just wasn't sure how deep they were or if they were reciprocated.

'Yeah, he's actually a really great dancer.' Rory said smiling, unable to stop herself she sighed a little and hugged a pillow to her chest. 'He's different.'

'Rory, I want you to tell me the truth, do you still have feelings for Jess?' Lorelai asked.

'Maybe, No, I mean…I don't know possibly, I'm so confused at the moment.' Rory threw the pillow onto the floor in frustration, tucking her legs under her and turning to face her mum. 'I don't know what to do, one minute I think we could be really good friends, and then I start to feel more for him, but then all I can think about is how much it hurt when he left me. I don't know if I could take that again.' Rory explained.

'Honey, you know where I stand on this, I don't think Jess is the right guy for you, but…if you have feelings for him then maybe honey, you have to admit it to yourself and just follow your heart, I don't want you to pass up on anything you want because you're to scared. So just follow your heart.'

'I can't' Rory replied quietly, tears welling up in her eyes.

'Why not?' Lorelai queried.

'Because…He broke my heart.' Rory cried, tears now flowing freely down her face. Lorelai pulled her daughter towards her and sat with her, comforting her until they both fell asleep.

*

Rory was the first to wake up the next morning, somehow during the night she'd slipped onto the floor and was lying between the couch and the coffee table, her back ached as she pulled herself into sitting position and let her eyes adjust to the brightness of the room, lit by the mid morning sunshine. As she slowly got to her feet she heard noises from the kitchen and decided to investigate, walking in she found April making breakfast.

'Wow that smells great.' Rory said, pouring herself some of the coffee that April had made, she sat down sleepily at the table, trying to stop her head from spinning, she felt like she had a hang over and she hadn't even drunk any alcohol, the events from the night before were playing in a loop around her head, causing her more confusion than ever.

'My dad's been teaching me to cook some things.' April replied, setting a plate of pancakes and sausages in front of her soon to be step-sister.

'Well it looks great, thanks.' Rory smiled happily, 'I'd better wake my mum, we were meant to leave early for wedding dress shopping and it's already 10.30.' Rory said, but just as she was about to stand there was a knock at the back door. April swung it open to reveal Jess standing there.

'Morning.' April smiled, letting her cousin into the kitchen. Rory looked up at him and immediately smiled, the loop of events ground to a halt and all she could focus on was Jess standing in front of her, wearing jeans and a black top with the sleeves pushed up, holding out a Danish to her.

'Good morning.' Rory smiled as he took a seat alongside her.

'Morning, Luke asked me to bring by some Danish's for you all, he assumed that you wouldn't have left yet.' Jess explained his presence, reading the unasked question in Rory's sparkling blue eyes, she nodded her head and again smiled at him. April watching the exchange, and the following silence which was not uncomfortable, but relaxed and full of glances between the two older people, smiled to herself and went into the lounge to wake Lorelai, Danish in one hand and coffee in the other.

'I've been persuaded to stay here until the wedding, Luke's asked me to be best man.' Jess said after a while longer of silence.

'Really?' Rory asked, trying and failing to keep the edge of excitement from her voice, he smirked back at her by way of an answer, a gesture which caused her to blush slightly.

'Do you mind me staying?' He asked lowering his gaze to the table.

'Of course not!' Rory replied instantly, then suddenly jumped up from her seat, remembering she was still wearing the dress from the party, now creased thanks to sleeping on the floor, and that her hair was a mess.

'You ok?' Jess asked with amusement as she started trying to flatten the wrinkles in her dress.

'I look a mess.' She said embarrassed.

'No you don't.' He said in all seriousness, she paused for a moment a smile playing on her lips.

'I'm going to get changed, will you be here when I come out?' She asked leaning against the frame of the door to her bedroom.

'I have to get back to the diner, promised I'd help out.' Jess replied, Rory nodded slowly.

'Well thanks for the Danish, and uh…I guess I'll see you later.' Rory said a little nervously.

'Yeah it does seem to turn out that way doesn't it.' He smirked.

'Ok, so bye.' Rory smiled shyly, turning to go into her room and tripping over what her own feet, falling against the door. Jess chuckled a little, and Rory blushed hoping he didn't notice that it was him that had effected her, making her clumsy.

*

'It's hopeless, none of these dresses are right.' Lorelai sighed loudly, dropping onto the couch wearing a wedding dress with a very full skirt. April looked around at the racks of dresses, her eyes landing on a simple white gown, close fitting to the body, with little chiffon straps and a small blue ribbon tied around the waist.

'This ones beautiful.' April said picking it up carefully, Lorelai and Rory examined it carefully.

'It is stunning, but it's more Rory's style than mine.' Lorelai sighed. 'Ooh Rory you try it on.' Lorelai said with a glint of excitement in her eyes.

'What? No, mum you're the one getting married not me.' Rory shook her head.

'Come on it's just a little fun, don't you want to see what it looks like?' Lorelai tried to persuade her.

'Well…' Rory looked at the dress and smiled. 'Ok, but just because I know you won't rest until I've tried it on.' Rory replied picking up the dress and carrying it to the changing room. It fit her perfectly, hugging her small waist and flowing out gently from her hips, the soft fabric swaying with her movements, she walked out into the area where Lorelai and April were sat to show them the dress.

'Oh wow!' Lorelai took a sharp intake of breath. 'You look stunning.'

'Let me take a picture.' April begged, snapping a few shots of Rory, with the camera they'd brought so they could look through all the photos of dresses Lorelai was considering, to decide which looked best on her.

'It's a shame it's not you getting married.' Lorelai said looking over at her daughter, and watching the small smile on her face. 'What are you thinking about?'

'Nothing.' Rory answered a little to quickly.

'Then why are you smiling so much?' Lorelai quizzed.

'I'm not smiling.' Rory said quickly, turning to gaze at her reflection.

'I bet Jess would think you look amazing it that dress.' Lorelai said, noting the change in her daughters features, Rory smiled for a few seconds then turned to look at her mum.

'Mum, what are you doing? You hate Jess, so why make a comment like that? Me and Jess are friends, nothing more and even if there were more to it than that, we're both too young to be thinking about marriage.' Rory replied.

'I know all that, but I also know you and I can tell that you were thinking about a guy just now, and I have a feeling that it may be Jess who's effecting you so much, he always did have a way of effecting you and I may not think it's always for the best, but I just want you to be happy.' Lorelai spoke calmly.

'And you think Jess will make me happy?' Roy shot back defensively.

'As much as I don't want it to be true, I think he already is making you happy. Honey I saw the way you were looking at him this morning, and you spent basically the whole party talking to him, and then you danced and you keep saying you're confused about your feelings for him, but ask yourself this, if Jess came to you tomorrow and said he wanted to be with you, what would you say?' Lorelai asked.

'I…' Rory stumbled over her reply. 'Mum, I'm scared that he'll leave again. I just want to be his friend because then it won't hurt as much. Now can we please drop this.' Rory said going back into the changing room and taking the dress off, putting her denim skirt and white top on instead.

*

A/N- Sorry it's shorter. Please review.


	7. Crying Games

Things Could Be Different

Disclaimer: I don't own Gilmore Girls.

A/N- Hey guys, sorry it's been a while but I was away on holiday. Hopefully I will have all my stories updated soon, and I am working on something new. Please Review.

Chapter Seven: Crying Games

A week had passed since the party and the town was adjusting to Jess' presence, though they still felt he was the town hoodlum, they no longer constantly shot him dirty looks, and told him he wasn't welcome. Most of the residents had settled down once they realised that Rory was fine with him being here, with the exception of Taylor who still thought only of getting rid of Jess.

It was a Monday and Jess was walking aimlessly round the town, book in hand trying to figure out if he should go and see Rory, they'd been spending more time together lately, but there was something in her demeanour which worried Jess. She wasn't as relaxed as she had been, it was as if she was suddenly remembering all the reasons she'd been mad at him, she was starting to push him away. His decision was made for him when he saw her walking down towards the bridge, in a split decision he followed her, dropping down next to her on the bridge. She didn't look up, keeping her gaze looking over the smooth surface of the water.

'Hey.' He said quietly.

'Hi…' Rory said fiddling with the edge of her book.

'Are you ok?' Jess asked.

'Uh yeah.' She paused, still keeping her gaze away from his, which she could feel was on her face. 'I um…have a date tonight.'

The words shocked Jess, and he felt as if he'd been punched, he tried hard not to show it, but he wasn't hiding his emotions well.

'Really?…Who with?' Jess gritted his teeth.

'Just a guy I met at Yale, his names Ryan, he's pre-med.' Rory replied, hugging her book to her chest.

'Rory…' Jess didn't know what to say.

'Did you think we could just start over?' Rory asked, a flash of irritation in her eyes.

'No. I had hoped that we could try and work things out though, I know I hurt you Rory but I'm better now, you can trust me now. I don't want to loose you.' Jess said turning her face so she met his eyes.

'You can't loose me Jess, you don't have me. You've already lost me. Don't you see I can't just forget, it hurt too much and I don't want to feel like that ever again.' Rory shook her head.

'Rory…we should be together, you know it as well as I do, please just give us a chance. I won't hurt you again.' Jess said earnestly.

'I wish I could believe that, but I just can't do it anymore. This…us, it just wouldn't work, not again.' Rory said.

'Don't! Please don't say no, don't give up. Don't say no just because you're scared, please Rory we could be better, we can make this work.' Jess said, he hadn't planned on asking her to be with him again, not so soon anyway, but hearing she had a date with some other guy was tearing him apart.

'No! Jess I can't.' Rory said jumping to her feet and running off the bridge, not stopping until she reached her house, falling to the floor in tears. She sobbed for an hour solid, not sure what was making her feel so bad, it had been her choice to move on from Jess, but part of her knew that she'd never get over Jess. She dried her eyes and prepared half-heartedly for her date, by the time her mum got home, she was all ready and looking much better even if she didn't feel it.

'Hey hun, what time's Ryan picking you up?' Lorelai asked as Rory walked into the lounge, with a simple blue skirt and blue top on.

'In about five minutes.' Rory said quietly, sitting down next to her mum. 'I told Jess I had a date.'

Lorelai cast aside her magazine and focused all her attention on Rory.

'Ooh how'd he take it?'

'Not well, he started saying that we belonged together and that we should give us another try, he wants to be with me.' Rory said, her voice cracking a little towards the end of her sentence.

'And you said?'

'That I couldn't…mum I just can't go backwards, I need to move on and get over Jess.' Rory said, 'I don't want to be with him.' Even to herself the words sounded forced and untrue, her mum gave her a strange look.

'You really don't want to be with him?' Lorelai questioned. Rory looked away nervously, hearing a knock at the door she got up expecting her date, and sighing in relief that she didn't have to answer her mum's question. It was however Ryan who stood at the door, instead it was Luke.

'I just thought you should know…uh Jess left. He um asked me to give you this letter, I wasn't sure if I should but he asked so here I am.' Luke said uncomfortably, Rory nodded numbly, taking the envelope offered, she backed away from the door, leaving Luke and Lorelai alone, she went into her bedroom giving her mum instructions to tell Ryan she was ill when he arrived. Sinking down onto her bed she opened the letter carefully and read the contents.

_Dear Rory,_

_I'm sorry. After all I said, I promised I wouldn't hurt you again and I promised I wouldn't leave again, here I am running away. It seems to be what I'm best at. I meant what I said Rory, I want to be with you, but it's clear that's not what you want, I messed things up too badly last time. I can't stick around and watch you with some other guy. So you said you want to move on, get over me. So I'm giving you the chance, I'm out of the picture, I'll come back for the wedding but after that you won't see me again. I wish we could have worked things out…_

_I Love You, I'm sorry I never told you that in person, but there it is seeming so simple written down, just three little words. Yet knowing you don't feel the same way is more than I can handle. I'm sorry._

_Yours always,_

_Jess._

She didn't even realise she'd started crying until a tear hit the page, making the ink smudge a little. Dropping the letter to her lap she curled up on the floor sobbing her heart out. Lorelai came into the room and sat on the floor soothing Rory.

'I really messed this up, I didn't want to be with him because I was afraid it would end up hurting me, but not being with him is hurting me just as much. I've really lost him now.' Rory cried.

*

Jess drove fast away from Stars Hollow, dashing away the tears that were welling up, he wouldn't be that weak to let a girl effect him so much. It was amazing the ability they had to hurt each other. He pulled onto another road, not realising his destination until he arrived in the crowded New York Streets. The lights of the shops and signs shining brightly against the dark night sky.

*

A/N- Please don't hate me for this, sorry it's so short. Please review.


	8. On their own

Things Could Be Different

Disclaimer: I don't own Gilmore Girls.

A/N- Thanks for all the great reviews so far, keep them coming J

Chapter Eight: On their own.

Jess drove until he felt himself drawing dangerously close to sleep, deciding it was safer to pull off the road, whilst dreading his thoughts catching up on him again, he'd sworn he wouldn't hurt Rory again, promised himself he wouldn't leave her. But after talking with her, he knew that he stood no chance at being with her again, he'd messed up too badly the first time and now he needed to cut her from his life, not just for her sake but for his own. He couldn't carry this around any longer, this undeniable love for a girl he could never have, who he would never be good enough for. Never the less he found himself in a motel room, unable to sleep because of thoughts of her. At around three in the morning he gave up on the prospect of sleep, mulling over all the signs that had made him hope there could be something more than friends between himself and Rory. He scolded himself for agreeing to come back to Stars Hollow, and even more so for staying after the party. As it approached four he wondered absently where he'd come to a stop, he hadn't paid much attention to where he was driving to, needing to escape he'd made random turns, for all he knew he could have been driving in circles for hours, and be in Hartford. Deciding to find out, he pulled on his jacket and took a walk, figuring out pretty quickly that he was in Philadelphia. Lighting a cigarette he wandered around more, words burning in his brain, sentences muddling together into lines that made some king of erratic sense in his sleep deprived state, he collapsed onto a bench and pulled out the book he carried, and a pencil he had behind his ear, left there from marking notes in one of Rory's books, which he'd left at Luke's in his hurry to leave. He began scribbling down his thoughts, words jumbling together in the black pages at the front of the book, until he'd run out of black space, filled the gaps at the ends of chapters, and generally defaced his copy of _To Have and Have Not by Hemmingway. _Reading back through the words he found more and more ideas springing into his mind. He tossed aside the cigarette in his hand, having lost track of how many he'd smoked, the packet he carried still held a few but he tossed them into a garbage can, finding their influence not half as soothing as his writing, as the sun began to rise he walked the streets in search of a shop that sold paper. Finding one eventually, he stepped inside the 24 hour convenience store and paced the aisles until he found a shelf with some notebooks on them, picking up several along with some pens he made his way to the desk to pay. For almost three hours his thoughts weren't directly focused on Rory, though reading what he'd written he knew that the image of her had subconsciously been guiding his hand, she was the sole inspiration for this bout of creativity, after all she was the only one who'd believed he could do more. For three days solid, Jess wrote in his notebooks, sometimes staying inside the motel for hours, forgetting to eat most of the time and growing more and more fatigued from his lack of sleep, nothing else mattered to him than getting these words written down. Occasionally he would take walks around the city that he was now coming to love, stopping in various places and letting sitting to write some more. It was on the fourth day if his arriving in Philadelphia that he was approached in a small park.

'I've seen you here a few times, I'm interested what you're writing in those books.' The guy said standing in front of the bench Jess had settled himself on a few hours before.

'Not much.' Jess replied gruffly, not welcoming the distraction. When the man didn't take the hint to move of Jess rolled his eyes and turned away from his work, noticing there were in fact two men standing in front of him. 'I'm busy.' Jess said trying to control his anger.

'Sure, writing not much.' The second guy spoke up with a sarcastic tone. 'I'm Matt and this is Chris, we own a publishing house, nothing big…well I say own, we're planning on owning, we just need one more co-owner, and a name, and uh some clients.' The first guy spoke again, spiking interest with Jess.

'So what are you talking to me for?' Jess asked, setting his notebook aside, both guys looked between one another then back at him.

'You a writer?' Chris asked.

'No.'

'You're writing.' Matt pointed out.

'A lot of people write it doesn't make them a writer.' Jess replied tiredly.

'True, but you seem to be writing a lot making the possibility of you being a writer higher than you're average Joe with a pen in hand.' Chris said pointing at the nearly full notebook.

'So what if I am a writer. Which I'm not, I never wrote much before a few days ago.' Jess said through gritted teeth.

'What made you start?' Matt enquired.

'None of your business.'

'Fair enough, so what are you writing?' Matt pried.

'Just, I don't know what it is.' Jess replied truthfully. 'I just started writing.'

'Looks like a book to me.' Chris interjected, both the other men looked over to him, he'd picked up the notebook and started skimming it.

'Ever heard of privacy?' Jess snapped taking the book back.

'I'm the youngest of six kids so no not really. So would you be interested?' Chris asked.

'In what?' Jess asked growing more and more frustrated by the minute.

'Having us publish that book of yours once you've finished it.' Matt explained.

'It's not any good.' Jess said, putting himself down as usual. Rory would have hated it, told him not to sell himself short. His thoughts drifted to Rory again but he pushed them aside to listen to what Chris was now saying.

'Maybe not, but we've not published anything else so we've got nothing to compare it to.' Chris joked.

'Do you read much?' Matt asked.

'Sure I guess.' Jess replied evasively. In truth he was amazed that anyone would want to publish his writing, and he wanted to prove that he could do it. More than that he wanted to prove it to Luke and to Rory.

'Then I'm guessing you know a bit about literature, what's good and what's bad.' Matt said.

'I have opinions.' Jess replied.

'Ok so how'd you feel about becoming a third owner of unnamed publishing house/bookstore.' Matt asked. Jess was taken back and looked at the two of them in shock, trying to figure out if there were for real or just messing with him, but everything pointed to them being sincere.

'I don't have any money, I'm a high school drop out I can't run a publishing house.' Jess shook his head.

'Why not? We already own the place so there's no expense there, just let us publish your book and we'll call that your share, we can show you the place now if you like.' Matt offered, curiosity got the better of him and Jess agreed to look at the place. Knowing from the minute he stepped inside that he would agree to their crazy plan.

'There's an apartment upstairs which me and Chris share, there's a spare bedroom that we're planning on renting out.' Matt said. 'We're not the cleanest of roommates, but judging from your appearance neither are you.'

'Yeah well I've been living in a motel for the last four days, I didn't exactly pack much and I've not been sleeping.' Jess defended.

'So any thoughts on the name of this place, we open in less than a week.' Chris asked.

'How about Truncheon.' Jess suggested pulling the first thing that popped into his head.

'Hmm…yeah I like it.' Matt agreed.

'Truncheon it is.' Chris laughed. 'So does that mean you'll take the job?'

'Sure why not.'

*

'You've been moping for days now Gilmore it's time to snap out of it, he's been gone for a week and a half and I don't think he's planning on returning until the wedding, not even if you read that letter for the hundredth time, so put it down and stop feeling sorry for yourself.' Paris said pulling the letter from her friends grip.

'What am I supposed to do? Go about with a smile on my face all summer, talk about how great everything is?' Rory complained, pulling her duvet around her shoulders.

'I watched you do this to yourself before Rory, and over the same guy he left again so don't get hung up on it, you knew it would happen isn't that why you wouldn't date him again because you knew he'd leave?' Paris shot back.

'It wasn't supposed to hurt this much.' Rory said a tear slipping from her eyes.

'Quite frankly I don't blame him for skipping town.' Paris folded her arms over her chest, pleased that she'd got the desired reaction from Rory who sat bolt upright in bed. Anger simmering in her eyes.

'He left again! How is he not to blame for that, after he said he would be better, he goes and does this.' Rory snapped.

'Sure, after you tell him that you don't want to be with him. Rory he's in love with you, has been ever since I first met him..' Paris began but was cut off by Rory.

'No he doesn't love me, if he loved me then he wouldn't keep leaving.' Rory shook her head.

'It's because he loved you that he goes, do you think it's easy for him to stick around and watch you move into some other guy when he loves you and knows he can't be with you, wake up Rory you're not that stupid. Would you really hang around someone you loved that much and watch them fall for someone else, if you want the answer to that just look at how jealous you got of the girl Jess was with when we got back from Washington. I only saw you around them a couple of times and it was so obvious.' Paris said using her usual lack of tact.

'I was not jealous of Shane.' Rory defended. 'I just didn't like her.'

'Sure whatever you say Gilmore.' Paris rolled her eyes.

'You're not doing a very good job of making me feel better you know.' Rory said flopping back against the pillows.

'I wasn't trying to make you feel better, I'm trying to get you out of bed because we're meant to be volunteering at the hospital today, you know how much Yale loves that stuff, and it's not over just because we're in Yale, they expect all their students to take part in extra curricular activities and volunteer work, it's basically the only way to secure a place in a good post grad programme or get a good reference to get a job.' Paris replied.

'Well I'm sorry I don't feel every Florence Nightingale today.' Rory pulled the covers over her head, but they were quickly removed by Paris.

'Get up now, get some breakfast and please take a shower, you smell awful.' Paris instructed, Rory reluctantly obeyed fearing how much Paris would yell if she didn't.

'Fine I'm up.' Rory sighed.

'You'll get over him, even if it kills me I will get you over him.' Paris promised. As Rory walked off to the bathroom she doubted Paris' words, she wasn't sure she would be able to get over Jess, at least not quickly, but she'd take the route she had last time, and throw herself into work, making sure she was busy all the time then maybe her thoughts wouldn't rely so heavily on playing over how badly she missed Jess, and how stupid she'd been to let him go.

A/N- I much prefer the Jess part to this than the Rory. What do you think, please review.


	9. For what it's worth

Things Could Be Different

Disclaimer: I don't own Gilmore Girls.

A/N- Thanks for all the great reviews so far, keep them coming J

Chapter Nine: For what it's worth

'I'm worried about her.' Lorelai said looking thoughtfully at her daughter who was sat at the table in the diner staring into space. 'She's not right, she hardly talks, she's sleeping all the time, barely eating. I could understand it if she was sad, angry or wallowing, but it's like she's shut herself off.'

'It's been a month, she'll be back at school soon, do you think she'll be feeling better by then?' Luke asked, he too had been concerned about how Jess leaving had effected her.

'I don't know. I've tried everything I can think of, Lane's tried and Paris has tried. I'm at a loss, she just seems so broken and I don't know how to fix it, I should know how, I'm her mother. I'm meant to stop her getting hurt.' Lorelai paused. 'I just never saw this coming, I didn't realise how much she loved Jess until he was gone, and now…what do I do? This is so much worse than last time he left, she was busy then we went to Europe, she started Yale, she was ok. Though now I'm thinking she was just pretending to be ok. The only thing I can get her to talk about is the wedding, but then every now and then this look comes across her face and I know she's thinking about seeing him there.' Lorelai sighed again.

'There are some things she's going to have to fix on her own.' Luke replied. 'You can't protect her from everything.'

'No, but I should be able to help a little. So now I'm going to ask you something and I want you to remember that you love me and it would be a terrible thing to lie to your wife-to-be.' Lorelai said seriously. 'Do you know where Jess is?'

Luke looked back at her with concern, before nodding his head slowly.

'I wasn't sure you'd want to hear about it.' Luke shrugged.

'I'm not sure I do either, but it wasn't him this time right, she pushed him away, told him that she didn't want to be with him, this isn't his fault but maybe he can fix it.' Lorelai replied.

'I don't know. Lorelai, Rory isn't the only one who got their heart broken in this. I've been spoken to Jess a couple of times since he left and he's not in good shape. He's working in a publishing house but there's something in his voice, and emptiness. He loves his work but I can tell that he still thinks of her. It might be hard at the moment but maybe it's better if they just both move on now.'

'What if they can't?' Lorelai asked. 'What if they could work it out, get back together, get closure, whatever. They either need to be together or say goodbye, Rory said that was the hardest part about last time, he just took off and they never really finished things, everything was left open. They need to say goodbye.'

'What do you really think?' Luke asked. Lorelai looked at her daughter thoughtfully, watching as she pushed her food around her plate.

'I think things could be different this time.' Lorelai replied.

'Ok then, I'll write down his address and what you do with it is up to you.' Luke replied, writing an address on a piece of paper from his order pad.

'Philly huh? And he's working you said.'

'Yeah, he's doing really good, making something of himself and pulling his life together. Aside from this thing with Rory that he can't seem to get past he's doing really good.' Luke replied slightly worried.

'This will be good for them Luke.' Lorelai reassured walking back to her table she sat opposite Rory and slid the paper in front of her. Rory's eyes focused on the paper and she looked at her mum questioningly.

'Jess' address.' Lorelai stated. Rory's eyes widened in surprise, her heart skipping a beat. She jumped to her feet and grabbed the paper running from the diner, as fast as she could until she reached her car, driving furiously until she pulled up in front of a building marked as Truncheon books. With her heart pounding she got out of the car, standing in the heavy summer unable to move. She didn't care that she was getting drenched, she just couldn't bring herself to go inside, afraid of what she might face. Instead she sunk to the ground leaning against the shop window and sobbed.

*

'It's good man, really good.' Matt said putting the finished book down on the counter and patting Jess on the back. 'We've put some up over there in the window.'

'Hey would you and Chris mind if I took a couple of days off, there's someone I'd love to show this too. I'm not sure she'll want to see me, but…' Jess trailed off not knowing how to explain, he wanted Rory to know he was better now, that he'd pulled himself together and could be relied upon. Unsure of if it would make a difference, willing to try.

'Course.' Matt nodded, him and Chris had heard very little about this mysterious Rory, but they both knew better than to ask, whoever it was obviously meant a lot to Jess, they were also very obviously the inspiration for the book. Anyone who read it could understand that.

'Hey guys have either of you noticed there's a crying girl leaning against the shop window.' Chris said coming down the stairs into the store. Both men's eyes turned to the figure huddled up in the dark.

'I'll go.' Jess offered, opening the door and walking out, he froze as a pair of blue eyes met his chocolate brown ones.

'Rory…?' His voice cracked on the name, she got to her feet and wiped at her tears.

'I wasn't sure you'd want to see me.' She said nervously.

'How long have you been here?' Jess asked pulling her inside out of the rain as she was shivering.

'Um not too long. Uh…my mum got your address from Luke, I uh came straight here…I just had to see you.' Rory replied, noticing the other two guys staring at them.

'Funny, I was planning on coming to see you.' Jess smirked lightly, though his mind was working a thousand miles a minute trying to figure out what she was doing here, she looked so small, so broken. A small spark of hope flickered. Both unable to tear their eyes away from one another. 'Uh there was something I wanted to show you…I didn't think you'd believe it unless I showed you in person.' Jess said going to pick up a copy of the book.

'Well colour me curious.' Rory said trying to lighten the mood. He handed her the book, both becoming more relaxed.

'A book?' She questioned. 'The subsect by….' Her eyes met his. 'Jess Mariano, you wrote a book!' She said a smile spreading across her face.

'I guess so.' He shrugged. Her eyes met his again and she moved forward quickly and kissed him, much like their first kiss at Sookie's wedding so long ago. Jess kissed her back holding onto her waist as if he was afraid she'd disappear. Rory pulled back a little and smiled at him.

'For what it's worth I always knew you could do it.' She smiled.

'Which is the only reason I ever did. If it weren't for you..' He said quietly, but she hushed him, pressing her lips gently to his.

'I love you.' She said her eyes filling with tears. 'I want this to work, I've tried being without you and it really doesn't work.'

'Oh yeah?' He questioned, a playful smirk on his face.

'Yeah.' She nodded.

'Then I guess we'll just have to make it work, because I love you too, and I'm not planning on losing you again.' He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her again.

'Next time I'm going to go out to the crying girl in the rain.' Matt commented, bringing Rory and Jess out of their trance to face the other two in the room.

'Somehow I don't think it would have had the same result.' Chris laughed.

'Uh guys, this is Rory, uh Rory that's Matt and that's Chris, we run Truncheon together.' Jess introduced them.

'It's nice to meet you both.' Rory said politely, standing at Jess' side, his arm round her waist, his free hand holding one of hers across their stomachs.

'So this is the girl you wrote the book about?' Chris said, already having guessed that it must be.

'You wrote it about me?' Rory asked, a smile on her face as she leaned up and kissed him. 'I want to read it.'

'Well I gave you a copy.' Jess smiled. 'Come on it's late, do you need to be back in Stars Hollow tonight?'

'I don't want to leave you again.' Rory said clinging to him.

'Then how about I come with you, I'll stay the weekend, figure out how this long distance thing will work.' Jess offered, Rory relaxed again and hugged him.

'You're wonderful.' She smiled. 'Ok, you drive. I want to read your book.'

*

Jess and Rory pulled up in front of the diner, Rory reluctantly putting down the book, taking Jess' hand to be led inside. The diner had closed long ago, but Lorelai still sat at the counter drinking coffee, looking worried. Luke at her side. They both swung round as they heard the bell above the door.

'You figured things out?' Lorelai asked.

'Yeah we did.' Rory smiled giddily hugging her mum. 'Thanks for getting me the address.'

'Aw no problem sweets.' Lorelai said pleased to see a smile on her daughters face.

'Uh Luke is it ok if I stay the weekend?' Jess asked.

'Of course, stay as long as you want.' Luke replied.

'Well I need to be back at work on Monday, so just the weekend will be great.' He said. The four of them sat talking for a while before all deciding it was late and they needed sleep. As the girls prepared to leave Jess pulled Rory aside.

'I'll come by tomorrow and we can talk over the distance.' Jess said kissing her.

'Ok.' She sighed happily.

'I love you.' He added quietly.

'I love you too.' She smiled.

A/N- Hope you like, there will be more soon. Please review.


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